Every third day, in our #EveryThreeDays campaign, I write about a woman killed by a man. Previously this month, on August the 1st, we have remembered Miriam Nyazema, who was murdered in cold blood by her former boyfriend because he was jealous of her new relationship.

Today we remember another woman who was killed in similar circumstances because of a boyfriends jealousy – Denisa Silmen. 

Denisa was just 25 years old.

She had a relationship with Alin Apopei, but the relationship started to sour, and because of his threats towards her, she fled to her mothers home in Romania. As often occurs, the perpetrator talked his way back into the victim’s life, and in consequence, Denisa lost her life.

Men like Alin Apopei do not change.

Denisa’s murder is different because the act was recorded on her phone. It is not known if this was by accident or on purpose. The Sun reported his trial – Apopei was claiming mental illness as an excuse for him murdering Denisa:

On July 30 2015, Miss Silmen’s mobile phone was recording sound as he stabbed her to death. Her last words were: “You finished me off,” the court heard.

Miss Silmen was found dead at the flat they shared in east London. She was partially naked and had suffered from “horrendous injuries”. Prosecutor Zoe Johnson QC said: “Her head was almost entirely severed from her neck, and her chest cavity was cut open, revealing her internal anatomy.” Sentencing him to life in jail, Judge Gerald Gordon QC told Apopei: “You killed her because you could not face the fact she was finally leaving you.

“The attack that killed her was ferocious and sustained including blunt instruments including an iron, manual strangulation and very many stab and slash wounds.” He said there were 62 injuries disfiguring the victim, probably inflicted after death, adding: “It can properly be described as a slaughter of an innocent.” 

The judge said the killing was “most likely the product of narcissistic rage of Denisa leaving you”. Apopei appeared close to tears and agitated as he was sent down. Apopei’s was found guilty after a jury at the Old Bailey rejected his defence of mental illness.

Jurors heard the couple had a “volatile” relationship, and Apopei had been violent towards Miss Silmen before. On one occasion, he told her: “If you will leave me, I shall kill you. “If I will go to prison, I will pretend I am mad, they will put me in hospital, and I will get free from there because I have lots of money.” 

In February 2015, Miss Silmen visited a friend in Italy, and the defendant turned up on Valentine’s Day to surprise her. During a night out at a Milan nightclub, the victim said she could not take any more, and Apopei slapped her, jurors heard. Miss Silmen fled to her mother in Romania but later got back together with her violent boyfriend, jurors heard. A month before the murder, Apopei laughed and threatened her and a friend, saying: “One day I kill you both.”

 

Denisa Silman

#EveryThreeDays

Authored by Steph @PlaceSteph

 

 

 

 

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(Pronouns - she/her) - Steph Richards is a 73-year-old 'post-op' trans woman with a Gender Recognition Certificate and works as a human rights activist. She was the elected Women's and LGBT Officer at Portsmouth Labour Party 2021 - 2024, CEO of Translucent.Org.UK, winner of the LGBT Organisation of the Year at the National Diversity Awards in 2022, co-founder of Women's Action Network (Portsmouth) and a volunteer at a Women's health charity. Steph was shortlisted as a "Gender Role Model" at the National Diversity Awards in 2025. Steph has been platformed live on BBC Radio 4 three times, including Women's Hour. She has also appeared on Times Radio, LBC Radio, GB News and Channel 4 News. In 2023, Steph debated trans human rights at an American university event alongside Harvard biologist and author Carole Hooven, PhD. Steph (an intersectional feminist) is passionate about the inclusion and acceptance of trans people in society. She advocates for women in prison, specifically pregnant women and calls out the mounting concern that abortion rights are at risk in the UK. She was the recipient of an Inspirational Women of Portsmouth Award in March, 2023.

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